I have always been a good girl, but at the same time rebellious. Never rude, but for as long as I can remember I have refused to accept things just because or because someone says so.

I studied in one of the best schools in Medellin academically and, although I always paid attention in class and never missed a subject, my way of rebelling was not doing homework. I thought it was the last straw that after studying from 8am (or maybe before) to 3pm, I had to get home at 4pm, tired, to continue studying.

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Today it makes me laugh, but at that time I was dying of rage. What was the logic? In addition to the homework, we were also supposed to study more because we had an exam first thing every day.

When did I study for an exam? Never. Lies, I am exaggerating. I did study for chemistry because that subject never wanted to enter my brain despite being the only one I studied with rigor. Well, I also studied for art history, but that was not studying for me.

Despite my rebelliousness with homework and exams I never missed a subject, I was able to graduate, enter college, work in a more or less functional way, but when I decided to be independent and start my own business I realized that I didn’t have an ounce of discipline in my body.

All my life I delivered what had to be delivered, I did what had to be done only if it was mandatory to deliver it or do it, but when you are your own boss, the boss always ends up saying never mind, another day, it’s okay to rest and you end up in an infinite spiral wasting time and learning more than necessary about the many Netflix series.

So, now that I’m at an age where some kids dare to brazenly call me “ma’am” and I don’t hang them just for fear of jail (this is irony, I don’t want to hang any human being) sometimes I find myself thinking why I never did homework, how many things I would have done with my business by now if discipline was part of my life?

Well, I’m not going to judge myself that hard either. I’ve improved and, truth be told, I’m proud of the progress I’ve made, but what a lot of work I would have saved myself if I had understood from school that sometimes being bad is good too.

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